I'm on the Patch

His mind won't change. Of course it won't. His mind is made up, because I'm.....not.....her. Gawlee if you only knew how much I liked him. My mind spins when I think of what he thinks of Me. My stomach turns when I think of all the reasons he doesn't like me. I shudder when I think of me moving on to someone else. I hate this. You....are putting me through this. No.....I'm not blaming you....I'm just saying the subject of you drives me to grab a pillow and blanket and climb in my closet and sleep....and wake up to my parents wondering where I am and my mom bringing her dinner into my room to ask me what could possibly be going on inside this psychotic head of mine. Gosh....I love these times that I will be able to tell my kids.

My step-dad and grandpa just went to New Mexico and my brother is at a friend's house. It's just Me, Mom, and Nana and we are going Christmas shopping tonight and then having a sleep-over. I am such a nerd for being excited about this.

Friendship is a wonderful thing when it's with Sarah Green.

I want to be your friend. I don't want to like you. I want to hold the title of "Best Friend" and that's it. I want you to not feel uncomfortable around me and I want you to come and talk to me about anything (even though you are not a deep thinker). I want that....but I like you.

Christmas is coming up and all I want is peace of mind. Can you give that to me?

I cried the other night because it's all building up and it all finally just came tumbling down. I've been thinking and I've been pondering and I've been deciding and I've been turning the thought of you and everyone else around and around in my head. It was all finally just too much....and I cracked. I want to tell someone everything....

Me and Collin are going to lunch. Peace Out everyone.